Research has shown an increase in gay tops now willing to label themselves as “ versatile ” (i.e., comfortable pitching or catching), explains Mark McCormack, professor of sociology at the University of Roehampton, London. The latter concern still very much exists, but thankfully, the former has receded, giving way to one of my New Year’s resolutions: losing my receptive anal V-card. I say “almost” because alongside the self-loathing was a non-zero fear of shitting the bed while being impaled by a fencepost. I’ve taken embarrassed pride in the “top” designation for most of my adult life, but at the age of 40, I’ve realized that labeling myself as such was almost entirely related to internalized homophobia.
